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Content Enable editor Use plain text Code entry Dictated while driving to church. It started with the concept that many tough decisions are recurring. The situation presents itself again, and again we have to decide. In this case, I had decided to leave Greg's food all to him so that he would see how much he was throwing away. He even seems to think he's getting his nutrition just because he bought it. Now for the car dictation: One of my confusion points from this morning was trying to bring food with me for lunch because I was going to go Garden after church. As I tried to find food that was easy to take on the road, I saw all of Greg's food going bad that he bought and didn't eat. I should have grabbed some of it. Pre-made meals. Meals. It all looked great. And I did that in the beginning. But then I felt confused about the financial arrangement between us. I did not like the idea of benefiting from him financially when I'm just trying to help him as a friend. That is confusing because he would like to contribute financially and he is uncomfortable imposing on me. So in the beginning I said I will eat your discards. But even that statement was a little humiliating and then over time I noticed how much anxiety I had. Just asking him if he was throwing away something or going to eat it. Some of some of the things he actually didn't know yet. It was an uncomfortable recurring conversation and then he started saying He bought such and such food for us. Then I felt obligated to eat such and such food that he bought. Then I felt obligated to also buy food for him when I was shopping. And then I got back into all that. How much time and money am I going to waste on food that someone else doesn't want. Or how much time am I going to spend pondering whether a person would like this or not. It is so much anxiety that I insist on keeping our food separate. So instead of taking advantage of the food, he throws away as easy free grabable food for me, I decided to leave the line clear. Clear. Him throw away his own food so he knew it was being thrown away and maybe be a little more motivated to eat the food. Maybe feel a little more concerned about money. Maybe think for himself and do for himself rather than blurring the lines and hoping I will do for him and think for him. All right, yes that is the better decision and it keeps coming back to me every time I'm in that predicament of looking in the refrigerator for something to eat and seeing something that he has left for days and I would still eat. The decision keeps coming back. It has to be made again and again and who has time for that?

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